After Maggie has a provocative dream about The Property Brothers, Emma insists it’s time for her to get back out there and snaps pictures of Maggie for a Tinder profile. Maggie’s younger brother, Zach, volunteers to babysit Charlotte with the help of her ex-husband, Bruce. They’ve been looking to get in some “dunkle” time, i.e. dad + uncle time. Maggie thanks him but says no thanks; she just wants to meet someone the old-fashioned way, like in a Tom Hanks movie.
It’s male-bonding day when Jay takes Luke into the garage to show him the way around tools and impart some manly wisdom, and Gloria goes with Claire and Lily to shop for Lily’s flower girl dress. Elsewhere, Mitch, Cam, Alex and Manny go for a cultured day at the museum but it eventually becomes survival of the smartest. And Phil enthusiastically offers to help Andy with his anniversary gift to his girlfriend, which is an elaborate video expression of his love.
Cameron is in charge of the school’s big spring dance, but when a popular teacher returns from sabbatical, a bit of not-so-friendly competition blooms. And with Claire on chaperone duty at the dance, Phil gets Haley to accompany him to his annual realtor’s banquet and is looking forward to impressing his little girl. Elsewhere, Mitch starts a new job and can’t seem to get a good read on the new boss or the work environment. Jay and Gloria babysit Lily and an accident with Gloria’s purse ignites a case of whodunit and it’s Lily’s word against baby Joe’s.
Phil is upset to have lost his elected office of social chair to his nemesis Gil Thorpe, and when he finds out Luke is competing against Gil’s kid in a wrestling match, it becomes his own personal battle. Claire is nervous for a big client meeting but things get extra hairy when Mitch and Cam ask her to pick up Lily from school and conveniently leave out the fact that her class just had a lice scare. Elsewhere, Gloria chaperones Manny’s school field trip to the museum.
Claire and Phil decide to spy on Luke and Manny as they’re hanging out with one of their more questionable friends. Meanwhile, Gloria is furious with Jay because she thinks he had a dream about another woman, but Jay misinterprets her anger for another offense he committed. And, Cam secretly uses Mitch as a scapegoat to get out of attending a party, while Haley tries to keep her photography exhibit a secret from her family.
Phil and Claire take Haley out to dinner to discuss her future but Haley manages to turn the tables. Elsewhere, Jay’s friend Shorty and wife Darlene are back visiting and they have some news that doesn’t sit well with Jay. And, Mitch and Cam decide to have a nice, romantic dinner date where they don’t talk about the wedding or about Lily, which then leads to a lot of awkward silences.
The high school open house puts the parents in a bit of a time warp when Claire finds herself stressed out by all the pressure, Gloria encounters a “mean girl” mom (guest star Jane Krakowski) and Jay teaches Phil how to play a little hookie. Elsewhere, Mitchell gets defensive when he encounters his judgemental, environmentalist neighbor (guest star Jesse Eisenberg) and Alex goes to see a therapist (guest star John Benjamin Hickey).
Phil tricks Luke into taking a dance class but the jokes on him when the white lie indirectly lands him in the slammer. Meanwhile, Jay and Gloria are throwing birthday parties for both Manny and Joe and are concerned Manny might be going for girls out of his league, and Mitch and Cam get a rude awakening in the cutthroat world of booking a wedding venue.
Jay takes Manny out to cut down their own Christmas tree, and Gloria is on edge with mom in town but changes her tune when she sees her bonding with Claire. Elsewhere, Mitchell is forced to do last minute shopping when they didn’t get Lily the right gift and Cameron takes Lily to a charity event and they experience the true meaning of Christmas.
With a big football game coming up and a record to break, Coach Cam is intensely focused and showing no mercy even when the opposing team is playing with an unexpected disadvantage. Elsewhere, Claire is determined to prove to the staff that she is more than just the boss’s daughter, and Phil tries to teach his kids a lesson about optimism but the universe just isn’t cooperating.