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'Until You Beat Me, You're Nothing': John Cena's Top Verbal Smackdowns In The WWE
John Cena has laid the smackdown on opponents verbally several times in his lengthy WWE career.
The WWE Superstar is unparalleled in the ring when it comes time to throw down, but many may not know that he’s also an expert wordsmith who has been responsible for some pretty harsh disses throughout the past two decades.
While there’s no shortage of Superstars who can win a wrestling match in the WWE, very few can shut their opponent up without even throwing a punch the way Cena can. As both Cena and his fans look back at his long and storied career, we thought it’d be worth taking a look back at some of John Cena’s best WWE trash-talking moments.
Shutting Down Sheamus
When Irish Superstar Sheamus called out John Cena at “RAW,” The Dr. of Thuganomics took to the microphone to get inside his head by mocking his physical appearance. Cena stood at the top of the aisle and pretended to get a phone call in which he described Sheamus’ look.
“Yeah, I can see him. I’m staring at him now. Oh no, he’s pretty pale. HE’s like a jar of mayonnaise with eyeballs and a ketchup haircut,” Cena says, collecting a smattering of applause from the crowd as he shrugs.
Sheamus wasn’t pleased.
Sizing Up Triple H
John Cena is one of the nicest guys in sports entertainment, so when he gets mad, you’d better watch out.
That was the case when he was squaring off with Triple H, who was bragging a bit too much about having the title when Cena didn’t.
“It still don’t mean a damn thing. Look at you: You walk around on your high horse, you even call yourself the measuring stick. This is Monday Night ‘RAW,’” he says. “You may have that but until you beat me, you’re nothing.”
Cena Disrespects Rey Mysterio
As fans of the WWE know, John Cena's best insults often come in the form of a rap. Such was the case when he was confronted with the very idea that the likes of Rey Mysterio could beat him in the ring.
“John Cena losing to Rey Mysterio? That’s like Big Show at a buffet ordering one Cheerio,” he says. “You can say you’re a grown man, I just don’t believe you. You’re a baby, I don’t know whether to spank you or breastfeed you.”
The diss made the wild eyes of Rey Mysterio get even wider and wilder.
Dethroning The King And Queen
In a short but sweet diss, Cena interrupts Booker T and Sharmell in the ring to call them “The dumbest lineup in 'Celebrity Jeopardy' history."
The remark is so cutting that Booker T can only wince and shake his head “no” as rage fills his entire body.
Cena’s Brock Lesnar Impression
Brock Lesnar is a man fueled by anger, so what better power move is there than to mock him and prove you’re not afraid?
That’s what Cena did when he did an impression of Lesnar. He talks like a Frankenstein monster, mocking Lesnre’s giant build and alleging that God forgot to give him a brain while he was sculpting all that muscle.
Advice To Ziggler
When Dolph Ziggler got a little too big for his britches, Cena came out to put him in check.
He mocks the Superstar for complaining about the organization too often and pretending that nothing bad that happens to him is ever his fault. Cena puts a cherry on top of the verbal bashing by telling him: “The only way a guy like you gets a set of nuts is by buying them at the concession stand.”
Ziggler says that Cena is simply not allowed to talk to someone of his stature that way… but he did.
Bad Movie Taste
Even when Cena is showing that he may not have the best taste in movies, he still manages to get one over on Kurt Angle. He tells him they’re not on the same level while comparing them to some pieces of cinema.
“You’re not better than me Kurt, you’re not even my equal, I’m like ‘Terminator 3’ and you’re like a ‘Legally Blonde' sequel.’”
Criticizing The Miz
As fans know, John Cena starred in the movie “The Marine” in 2006. The franchise went on to spawn three sequels that he was not a part of. In 2009, “The Marine 2” starred Ted DiBiase Jr., while “The Marine 3: Homefront” and “The Marine 4: Moving Target” starred none other than The Miz.
Well, when the Miz got a little too high on his own movie star supply, Cena took to the ring to put him in check. He lists the WWE Superstars who have gone on to star in films and notes that he almost forgot The Miz since “the only movies you’re in are crappy bootlegs of movies I already made.”
Cena Calls Out The Rock’s Showmanship
Cena has said a few times that The Rock isn’t up to his level of performance in the WWE. He says it right to his face in the ring at one point when he mocks the massive movie star for keeping notes for his promos on his wrist.
Cena even goes as far as to show that he’s got nothing written on him and just goes off the cuff.
Not Your ‘Brah’
Cena doesn’t take too kindly to Dean Ambrose complaining about a low blow during a match, arguing that he fights dirty in the ring all the time. So, in front of a massive crowd, Cena gets right in the Superstar’s face and tells him what he really thinks.
“I’m actually surprised that low blow even hurt you because you ain’t stepped up, you fell off,” he says. “All you’ve been showing the WWE universe is that you’ve got no balls, brah.”