None Of Your Business
S3 episode 2 Aired on June 23, 2017

While enjoying breakfast at a local restaurant, Maggie (Lennon Parham), Emma (Jessica St. Clair), and Charlotte have an awkward run-in with Tina (Lindsay Sloane), whom Emma hasn’t talked to since she and Mark got together. Bird Bones -- clad in a red business suit but unwilling to share any details about her new business venture -- is even more high strung than usual, and after her abrupt departure Maggie decides that Emma owes it to Tina to go check in and make sure everything is okay. 

So as Maggie heads off to work, where she and fellow nurse Jeff (Jeff Hiller) are beginning a weeklong rotation with the notoriously tough Dr. Ericson (Ben Willbond), Emma begrudgingly heads to Tina’s house. There, she discovers Tina, approximately 1,000 boxes, and the truth about Tina’s new career: in an effort to start a post-divorce career, Bird Bones has been hoodwinked into buying into a makeup pyramid scheme. When Emma sees how underwater Tina is, she offers to help. Unfortunately, things don’t go quite as smoothly as Emma had hoped at their meeting with Vanessa (June Diane Raphael), who sold Tina the makeup, and instead of getting Tina out of her commitment, Emma ends up buying two more Quantum Packages.

The ladies now have a lot of product to move, so they hit the ground running. Tina’s color-coded map of the Pinebrook market, customized Caboodle, and makeup application skills are impressive, but since she proves to be less effective when it comes to pushing product Emma feels she has no choice but to step in. She organizes a sales party at her house, hijacks Tina’s makeup demonstration, and generally makes Tina feel worthless.

And Bird Bones is not the only one suffering from Emma’s aggressive makeup sales tactics: thanks to the patented bee-sting lip-plumping lip gloss Emma applied on her, Maggie has shown up to work looking less like herself and more like Lisa Rinna, if Lisa Rinna melted. Maggie is worried she’s blown it with Dr. Ericson, but he surprises her with the news that he’s been so impressed by her work during their week together that he has actually requested that Maggie stay on his rotation. (Jeff too, but only because he likes to watch Jeff squirm.)

And Dr. Popsicle isn’t the only one full of surprises: when Emma and Tina meet with Vanessa again, Tina proves tougher than anyone had anticipated, stepping in when Emma falters and standing up to Vanessa. It looks like Bird Bones may be learning to spread her wings after all!