SEPTEMBER 9, 2007
TOO MANY QUESTIONS, TOO FEW ANSWERS

Everything's falling apart and it's my fault. If I hadn't brought Isabelle here in the first place then none of this would've happened. She wouldn't have betrayed me. And Jordan would still be here leading the movement like he's supposed to be. But now he's gone. Captured. I don't know where he is or even if he's still alive.

How could I have been so easily fooled? Has Isabelle been playing me this whole time?

I don't know what to think. The last few days I could tell she was troubled by something. I naively thought it was just her usual insecurities about not fitting in; ever since we came to Promise City she's felt like she didn't belong. Oh, how blind I was. I've been so wrapped up with stopping Shawn and Burkhoff's promicin compatibility test that I ignored the warning signs. And I let my personal feelings for Isabelle get in the way.

I'm haunted by her last words before she made me lose consciousness. She said I was her only true friend and that what she felt for me was real. If that were true, why is she doing this? Why would she betray me and everything we shared? Why betray Jordan and the very people who took her in and gave her a home?

None of this makes any sense.

It was just yesterday that I was telling Isabelle she didn't belong in the middle of the conflict between Shawn and Jordan. I was trying to protect her, to make sure she didn't get hurt. I must have sounded so stupid, not knowing her abilities had returned. And having no idea what she was about to do.

But who gave Isabelle her abilities back and how did they do it? Isabelle said that while she was in prison, the government doctors did some test and told her she was allergic to promicin. Was that a lie? Or is the future intervening again like they did when they gave my father the shot that took away her abilities in the first place?

Is it possible she's working with the government? She'd aligned herself with them once before, when she helped Dennis Ryland create the enhanced soldier program. So is the government using her again somehow to bring down Jordan Collier?

There are too many questions. And too few answers.

Cassie isn't giving me any either. She says this is what has to happen. But why? What about the prophecy? If something happens to Jordan Collier, there's no way it can come to pass. Cassie isn't talking, except to say that I need to step up and lead – that I need to take charge of Promise City. I don't think I can do it. I'm not Jordan and I never will be. Still, Cassie is insistent. She claims that I'm the one person who can keep Promise City on track. What else can I do but listen to her? I can't doubt my ability now. Cassie led me to Jordan. She led us to Promise City. Even when I thought I lost Isabelle for good when Richard was captured, Cassie told me to have faith. She said Isabelle would return and she did. So I have to consider the possibility: is this all a part of the plan?

Still, I can't help but be devastated by the events of the last twenty-four hours. Not only by Jordan's disappearance but also losing Isabelle. I feel empty. Alone. Will I be able to do Jordan proud and take on this new responsibility? I don't know if I have it in me. But I have no other choice. I have to try.