My story is a little unique. Yes, I was a Starter Wife. I lived for almost 22 years with a man who had hundreds of ideas for businesses, that never once panned out. I worked and supported the family while he dreamed up these ideas. Then, when the ideas never panned out. Guess who was to blame? Me, of course. I was made to feel I could never do anything right. The more successful I was at work, the harder it became. He seemed to blame me for our financial difficulties.
At one point he went through about $70,000 in my inheritance from my Grandmother, to start up one of his businesses, of course. He would always say how unfair it would be that I would get half of whatever he made when one of his ideas made it. After all the years of supporting him, this was his attitude.

The divorce took over 3 years, he fought everything. My kids had developed Paretial Allienation Syndrome, and I took my minor child to a type of deprogaming center clear across the country. My other child was too close to 18 to have the courts order that I could take him.

I have worked hard over the last four years to rebuild my life. I have paid out more than $60,000 in this divorce. I had good friends who took me in and gave my daughter and my self to live for low rent. I work 70 hours a pay period (2 weeks) and go to school to gain my Bachelors degree. I have one year to go.

I have since gone on Match.com and dated a few men and now have found a wonderful man. I am in the process of putting a modular home on my property. Life is good!!!! I wrote a poem about my life I would like to share...

"Now I Know"

It seems so long ago
It seems like yesterday
I felt so scared and alone
Dreams and hopes shattered
What once was love
What once seemed true
Vanished, now emptiness was here
Abuse and fear, replaced the love
And in my darkest hour,
When the lies seemed to take over
When some friends remained true,
When some friends believed the lies
I had hit bottom,
I had fallen so far
I had lost so much
I had to crawl and climb to see over the wall
It was on my knees, when I finally let go
God, you heard my prayers
You said to have patience my dear
Wait, worship, love.
You sent some to help me, to love me,
To make me part of a family
My heart softened, did not harden
Each little victory, I climbed a little higher
Always, looking back and saying,
Thank you Lord, I see your ways are right and good

Now I am happy,
Now I am not alone
Now I know firsthand the power of God
Now I know how much God loves me
I know because I have the love of my daughter
I know because my son now calls
I know because He brought me to you.

-- Katharine