GUS' BLOG

MARCH 1, 2007
I'm Just Saying


People ask me all the time if there's ever been any friction between Shawn and me in the years we've known each other. I always answer metaphorically. I mean think about it: I'm Bran Flakes and he's Lucky Charms; I'm a briefcase and he's a backpack; I'm elephant and he's donkey; I'm Sammy Hagarand he's David Lee Roth.

So has there been conflict? Sure. Has it ever come to blows? Absolutely, but not since we were little kids and I'll let you guess which one of us was left standing after punches were traded (that would be me).

And despite the fact that at least one of us is still about as mature as he was twenty years ago, Shawn and I are grown up. And we're still friends. And we owe it all to three little words:

I'm. Just. Saying.

I'll explain. "I'm Just Saying" is a phrase you use when you've just said something to tick someone else off. Consider this real-life exchange that took place in the Psych office just yesterday:

Shawn: Dude. Do not tell me that you were out making sales calls in that tie.
Me: This is a nice tie. People like it. Which is more than I can say for that shirt.
Shawn: What's wrong with this shirt?
Me: I'm just saying.

The perfect retort. The last uncompromising word. That's I'm Just Saying in action. It's a marvel of design, because there's nowhere to go from there. I'm just saying is an argument roadblock that prevents an exchange from becoming heated. Escalation stymied, conflict averted, case closed. Again:

Me: Shawn, the only reason that girl on the other side of the restaurant was looking at you is because she can hear you slurping your cereal. Everyone can.
Shawn: (glares and sets down spoon)
Me: I'm just saying.

Believe me. If there's anything that needs saying, "I'm Just Saying" is the ticket. But beware. It works both ways and can be used even when you're wildly out of line.

Shawn: Seriously Gus, Lyndon Johnson was by far our greatest president because he was from Texas.
Me: Um, excuse me. What about Lincoln? Washington? Kennedy? Roosevelt?
Shawn: They weren't from Texas.
Me: (blinking slowly while shaking head)
Shawn: I'm just saying.

Again. Nowhere to go from there, although there have been attempts. About 6 months ago, Shawn attempted to block an "I'm Just Saying" with a "What's Up With That?" It was a valiant effort, but I was ready for him:

Shawn: Look, the evidence is clear.
Me: Sure it's clear. If you're looking at it through your specially designed crazy-scope.
Shawn: What are you talking about?
Me: I'm just saying.
Shawn: (seethes, knows I'm right). What's up with that? You're harsh, man.
Me: Yeah, but still...

Yeah, but still. It's there to back up an "I'm Just Saying" when someone attempts a block. Use only when absolutely necessary. I guarantee you'll be pleased with the result. You've stopped an argument in its tracks, and now you can move on with your life.

I know this may seem like a lot of semantics, but working with Shawn is like the occupational equivalent of BASE jumping, and those three little words are like a ripcord that always keeps us landing on our feet.

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