AUGUST 23, 2007
HOLY SH*T, THAT'S STEVEN BAUER

OK, so I've been working as a TV writer for about six years, and I've had the amazing good fortune of having worked with some great, great actors, including Joe Mantegna, James Garner, Victor Garber, and Peter MacNicol, and some big TV stars, like Don Johnson and Rob Lowe. I say this not to name drop, but rather to make a point. I don't get easily star-struck. But every once in a while… it happens. It's kind of a joy and it happened on "Hard Bargain." But first a little bit about the genesis of this episode…

For some reason, I'm fascinated by kidnappings. I'm a sucker for great kidnapping flicks, like "Ransom," "After Dark, My Sweet," and most recently "Secuestro Express." And I read whatever I can on the subject. I once read Gabriel Garcia Marquez's book about a rash of kidnappings in Columbia during the 80's, News of a Kidnapping, cover to cover without even stopping to eat; it was that compelling. I don't know exactly what the attraction is, but I think it has something to do with the mind games that all the participants engage in, from the kidnappers to the hostage negotiators that are often called in. I thought it would be cool to see how Michael Westen would handle the situation.

So I pitched a story: a nanny's young son is abducted by a group of kidnappers who mistakenly believe the boy is part of the wealthy family for whom the nanny works. She has no money to pay the ransom, but fears revealing the truth because it could get her son killed; Michael comes in to help. The studio liked the idea, but thought it was too dark for our show. They had a point. So we lightened it by changing the nanny to a house-sitter and the kidnapping victim to the house-sitter's fiancé. The comic hook was that the house-sitter, a surfer slacker-type who looks after huge estates, had passed himself off as a rich guy to meet girls, and he'd never gotten around to telling his fiancé about his ruse. She thought he was loaded, too.

We then came up with the spy craft that Michael would use to rescue the fiancé: he would abduct one of the kidnappers and find a way to turn him into a double-agent. It felt very Burn Notice-y. After numerous outlines and drafts of the script, I was headed to Miami to prep the episode.

There were several key pieces of casting. One was Nick, the house-sitter. It was tricky. He had to be both humorously clueless and sympathetic. We were lucky to find Kelvin Yu. He's not only a real surfer, but also a talented young actor who was able to play both the comedy and drama of the situation. Another great casting find was Gonzalo Menendez – the kidnapper who would be turned into a double-spy. His challenge was to play both street-tough and vulnerable. Gonzalo knocked it out of the park. Arye Gross, who plays Perry Clark, the bumbling bureaucrat/bad-ass assassin, was also astounding. He totally sells it. The biggest piece of casting, however, was the kidnapping boss, Reyes, who would spar with Michael in the climax of the episode…

I was in a van scouting locations with our wonderful director, John Kretchmer, when he got the call that Steven Bauer was interested in playing Reyes. I looked at Kretchmer: you're kidding, right? I was a HUGE Steven Bauer fan. I'd seen "Scarface" like only… a hundred times. And I'd loved him in other stuff, too, like the movie, "Traffic" and the short-lived TV series, "Kingpin." He was perfect for the part. It was only fitting that the shoot would begin and end with scenes involving Steven.

The first scene that was shot was Reyes's initial meeting with Michael. Steven came up to me and introduced himself: "Hi, I'm Steven Bauer." I smiled and shook his hand firmly, trying to maintain my professional composure: "I know." In the scene, Michael has to convince Reyes that he's a legitimate hostage negotiator and not a cop. But Reyes has taken precautions: he has a sniper trained on Michael, and wants to see how he'll react. They both play it super-cool, and it ends with Reyes driving up in a Lamborghini, telling Michael to get in. Matt Nix walked up to me on the set during the filming of the scene and looked over at the guy sitting in the Lamborghini: "Holy sh*t, that's Steven Bauer." We giggled like schoolgirls.

The final scene that we shot was Reyes and Michael in the massage room. Reyes has arranged to negotiate the ransom while Michael gets a massage – a ploy used to insure that Michael isn't wired. Again, it's about two super-cool guys feeling each other out. I watched from the monitor as the cameras rolled. Steven and Jeffrey were clearly having fun playing the scene. I pinched myself... no, it wasn't a dream.

Steven finished doing the scene and walked out to tell me that he had really enjoyed doing the show. He'd been a real professional and gentleman throughout. I finally broke down and told him that I've been a huge fan of his for a long time. I think I stuttered a little. I'd gone from writer of the episode to just a fan. And he smiled, graciously.

A few weeks later, I watched a cut of the episode at home. Bauer is awesome. Actually, I'm blown away by everyone's work on the show. Kretchmer did a great job. My wife, Lisa, who watched it with me, says it's one of the coolest things she's seen. I agree.