Any self respecting woman knows ‘A body in motion needs a helluva lot of maintenance’. In fact that’s The Dizzyland 3rd Law of Motion.Now dental whitening I understand, especially for models who live mainly on coffee...but if nothing is going in the top end why are they now bleaching the bottom end too?

That’s right, I’m talking anal bleaching, it’s the latest corporal trend in Hollywood and none other than lingerie model Lola, is a fan. So that’s what it takes to catch a Dark Axe. Friends of Felix Soel confirm he’s dating the buxom Russian, and happier than ever.

Guess he’s not a caviar kinda guy though.

Oh oh, there’s trouble in paradise. Devon Marsh is in therapy; with his Catcher! Yeah, that’s who paid the waitress to seduce you! Apparently their coach thinks it’s a communication issue causing Devon’s decreasing strike rate. I hope it works buddy, cause there’s no rehab for losing the playoffs.

One Marsh who isn’t having trouble communicating is wife Liz, who was seen verbally abusing a fan at a game. You’re supposed to heckle the other team’s supporters Liz!

What that did make us notice though, is that Devon plays better away from home – maybe next week’s game in Chicago will see the return of ‘The Devonator’.

Miss Molly is desperate no more! The ‘Hollywood Ex-Wife’ has been officially signed up with UAA as a Writer. Well we know she can handle a laptop! What did Dizzy say about the 1st Law of Motion?? What went down is definitely on its way back up, you owe mve for that one Molly.

Coincidentally, Molly’s agent, Ted Kauffman was on the guest list of the Zach McNeill SMT party. So was his wife Eve, whom Molly revealed to have breast implants, made out of ‘canine solution’. Is this Ted’s cry for good karma? Could he be seeking a Re-Bachelorization for himself and stole the journal to discredit his wife’s sanity? Or maybe it was Eve herself; but could anyone really be that desperate for attention?

Oh this is a small little world, be careful it doesn’t collapse on you Miss Molly.

Speaking of rising from the ashes, rumor has it the Sheaster will be playing the President in dubious Kenny Kagan film ‘Blood Canal’. Ah how quickly they forget. Hang on, drunk, check; opposes gay marriage, check; earns more money than the rest of us but still claims to be ‘a man of the people’, check – he’s perfect for the Presidency!

But seriously, Shea is only half way into his 30 days, the man is supposed to be focusing his inner chi on getting sober not on channeling an evil President!

‘Blood Canal’ tanked at the test screening and the Kenny Kagan quick fix is to book a star, which may have been his motivation for moving into the Santa Monica Terraces. Shea who also calls the SMT home is only one of the famous faces you’ll see by the pool. Doorman Corey confirms Shea’s absence has been felt, though he could almost swear he saw him earlier in the week – but it’s impossible to escape from rehab. Twice. Right?

TIFFANY, actress, starlet wannabe and Zach McNeill’s ‘girlfriend’ is another face who is suspiciously absent poolside at the SMT. This isn’t uncommon for girlfriends at the Santa Monica Terraces, in fact that’s why so many of the tenants rely so heavily on doorman Corey, which in itself could be a double edged sword.

Maybe Zach’s concerned his new building buddy Kenny is going to move in on his territory and is having her keep a low profile – after all, she does fit his ‘Shoshanna’ type – except without celebrity – mmm maybe she doesn’t fit the mould after all.

Yes she has split with rocker turned painter Mel Stuart. The Hollywood A-Lister claims Stuart has become too introverted and moody, saying she is over the dark brooding types and just wants someone fun like her.

So what does one of Hollywood’s highest paid actresses do to cleanse herself after a break up? She meditates in a Salt Cave! No, I don’t mean some holistic retreat in the middle of Utah – the latest in Polish beauty rituals has made its way right here to Beverly Hills. Merely sitting in the presence of vast quantities of salt is said to cleanse, purify, tighten and rejuvenate skin.

Isn’t that how they make jerky?

And that is the Dizzy Dish – remember, don’t get star struck – just a little Dizzy.